Did you know that it is possible to not dread waking up on a Monday morning?
I didn’t. In fact….I am still waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop.
My alarm went off at 7am. I went back to sleep because I wasn’t ready to wake up yet. Could barely keep my eyes open to hit snooze.
My second alarm is set for 8am. Some days I am ready to go. But today….I just needed a few more minutes.
I reminded myself that 2 of our 4 dogs have vet appts today. So I had to be up by 930am regardless.
My brain finally said its time to deal with my migraine at about 9am, but my body said nooooooo lemme scroll facebook.
And so I did. Because I could.
I rolled out of bed at 928am. Ate a small breakfast, searched for my chacos, bribed one kid to stay out of the pool until Mama gets home, and then ran the dogs.
At no point was I stressed. In fact….24days ago – I would have had 2 minutes left in my lunch break for my 9-5.
I called it my brunch break because no where is serving lunch at 928am.
Except Whole Foods…….mmmmmm their bacon…..mmmmmmm
But here I am….sitting in the parking lot with my dogs in the back, waiting for the final vet bill.
I am learning how to live life on my own terms.
I am going to make mistakes. I am going to trip and fall flat on my proverbial face. But I am never going back.
I will say it again……I am right where I am supposed to be. And right now…..that is making peace with Mondays.
Reminder to self: take migraine meds when you get home!!!!!
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635pm update:
Aaaaaannnnnnnddddddd…..the proverbial shoe just dropped.
I am nailing this whole “I am a solopreneuer and I can do whatever I want to because I can!!!!” phase.
However..I just got a huge dose of reality.
I am still a mom.
I am still a mom to kids with anxiety and ADHD and Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD)…
….kids who require more than I remember sometimes.
This isn’t a new experience. Sometimes we go a month or two without a Cat 5 Storm and we start running on auto pilot.
Right when we forget that we have routines, and schedules, and patterns, and prepping, and transitions…..for a reason….
Just as I think I am getting in the groove of this whole work life balance concept…..somewhere between the adrenaline of living life on my own terms and being the best parent I possibly can….a glitch happened……
At least I think I am getting a passing grade in the wife dept……I hope. Maybe? HONEY?!?!?!?!
I do know however….that based on the amount of dog hair on my bedtime blanket….I am acing the role of animal parent. Sooooooooo there’s that……!
Moving on…..
Back to that proverbial shoe.
I forgot to refill our youngest child’s night night meds. If she doesn’t take them….she has been known to stay awake for 60hrs……..
….which in and of itself….leads to a whole mess of hot mess scenarios that often happen lightning quick once she passes the caution stage and plummets into the bright neon red DANGER ZONE OF EMOTIONS!!!!!!!
Her last dose was Friday night. It is now Monday night. She may have slept a total of 3hrs Saturday night….0 on Sunday…..do the math bc me plus numbers equals an eternity without sleep.
I called the pharmacy first thing this morning. No refills available. It might take a couple days to get her Pedi to call in the refill.
Ugh.
The last time we ran out of her night nights was because they were out of stock for a few days….
Logically…..we supplemented with melatonin.
The next day, our little 1st grader got suspended from school……
Yep. Thinking about dramamine at this point……. maybe….
Anyways….when I announced it was dinner time – all hell broke lose.
Because on top of her not sleeping for days……I also forgot to give her her ADHD and Anti-Anxiety meds……….
SH!T. Double whammy.
Thankfully I am nailing transitions. Phew. Or that would have been 3 strikes….a Cat 5 Tornado incoming……
But hey…..on the plus side…..our oldest today at Occupational Therapy (which was rescheduled 2 hrs later because I was zoned out in the zone of house cleaning for once in……months…..years maybe.)
Fudge…..I haven’t been that at peace with cleaning since I was pregnancy nesting with our youngest 10yrs ago…….
Nope. Gonna shut that idea down right this second.
Oh and now the sleepless child is calling from the pool for me to join her. So time to wrap this up.
Thing 1 learned today about the Zones of Regulation. And I am so glad she did.
Otherwise – as she was slamming doors and “UUUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHHH”ing at me in her best 11yr old going on 16 yr snarky voice……yelling that she is “IN THE RED DANGER ZONE MOMMMMM!!!!!……I wouldn’t have known that she was angry…..
….nope. never would have known.
Ok so my work + life (x kids) / balance formula needs a little work…..
I’m really going to have to get into a routine…………..
Fine.
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748pm update:
DINGDINGDINGDING!!!!! WE HAVE A TRIPLE WHAMMY…..
Transitioning to leave the pool was *chefs kiss* perfecto…..mama deserves a gold 🌟
Walking backward and tripping AND FALLING into a freezer drawer that has been waiting to be recycled and earning some battle wounds…..I watcher in slow motion as her world started imploding….
Discovering that a cat ate your dinner that you were going to eat after swimming that you left on the couch because IT’S FINALLY SWIM TIME!!!!……excuse me folks but this is the last stop. All engines will be turning off after this final stop.
Hope you are prepared for the treacherous journey to the top of Mt. Everest during a Cat 5 Tornado….
So here I am…..making extra spaghetti noodles bc of all family spaghetti nights….tonight was the night we had NONE leftover…..
Of course a perfect amount of spaghetti just HAD to be made tonight…..I mean….me eating 2nds probably didn’t help but this isn’t about me.
Why am I giving in? Shouldnt I just tell her to suck it up buttercup but in more loving terms? Maybe I should just teach her one of those hard life lessons….
Why don’t I just offer her something else?
Because Karen….I am afraid of her…….
Just kidding. I know my kid like the back of my hand in one of those blacked out fancy dinner restaurants.
I know her triggers. I can see the signs of a storm coming a mile away.
And frankly….I want more plain parmesan (why the eff was that so hard to spell?????) cheese covered noodles….
But…I also don’t want any more battle wounds to occur tonight….and by looking at her sad squishy face on the couch….if the wind changes direction we are all screwed. Bus driver included.
Besides…have you ever met a kid on the spectrum who is dead set on something and won’t budge?
Some battles aren’t worth fighting. And withholding the one thing she was looking forward to (noodles) sounds like torture.
Soooo ummmm Happy Monday Funday!
In all reality….it has been a damn good day. Even with all the road hazards.
I am an empathetic mother and I love being able to make sure my kids feel safe and loved and important.
More importantly though…..my kid is having a hard time this evening.
You would be too if you hadn’t slept in 600 million light years.
My kid isn’t a bad kid. She just needs people to love her unconditionally….in her positive moments, her hard moments, and her ugly storms.
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816pm update:
Not pictured: my fancy new hot water burns on my middle finger because of course…..
820pm update: also not pictured – the wet floor in front of the sink bc I didn’t realize there was still water IN the spaghetti pot when I triumphantly flipped it over to set in the dishwasher trying to be cool…..
Inhale exhale ok….its all going to be ok…
…..after this Dr. Pepper……
Adventure on with Curiosity (but remember to refill your sleep meds),
~Kelly
