Today marks my husband’s and I’s 8th wedding anniversary and 17 years total together.
It’s been a wild ride.
And 17 years has been a long time, especially for one that was just a rebound.
Or, rather, what was supposed to just be a rebound after an ugly breakup.
Instead, I went and fell in love with my rebound.
He makes me laugh, sometimes at the craziest things.
He goes along with my adventures. Even if just driving to the football game.
He plays my devil’s advocate when I need another perspective.
He is my go-to when I can’t think of a title for a photograph, or a caption for an image.
He handles the tools and I handle the schedule.
He believes in my insane ideas and I love that he knows that I am going to do it anyways.
He fixes while I break down. Not mentally, just everything else, like doom piles and error codes on dryers.
He pushes me while I push him.
And that is why we are celebrating 17 years together, 8 of those married.
Because in the end, while we are almost complete opposites and shouldn’t get along according to our zodiac signs, and we may banter and bicker like professionals, but we are always there for one another.
He supported our family when I quit my job to pursue my dreams. While I know he wished it would have taken me 6 months and not 18 to get my shit together, he only ranted once. In 18 months.
So, when I pressed submit on Amazon Kindle Direct Publishing, he made sure we celebrated this huge milestone.
That, my friends, is why I love this man and have loved this man for 17 years.
Not because of his parenting style and the way he makes the kids laugh, roll their eyes, or call him out when he farts.
But for the fact that he reminds me, I need to eat when I am hyperfocused.
That, my friends, is why I love this man and have loved this man for 17 years.
Ok, so he is a pretty awesome dad and I fall in love with him harder every time he interacts with our kids.
And he is a pretty damn strong man when it comes to doing the shit I can’t do around the house. Or don’t want to do.
Now, just because I am madly in love with my husband 17 years later, and while this year – year 7/16 – has been our best year yet, doesn’t mean its all been unicorn sparkles and rainbows.
Nope. Some days, it’s been a battle remembering the love I have for him. But that is natural. And if someone says otherwise, fuck ’em.
Marriage is hard fucking work. It is messy, and demanding, and complicated.
But it is also hot, and fun, and full of warmth and love and adventures.
It’s all in how you communicate, my friends. It’s all in taking responsibility. And it is all in apologizing as soon as you know you messed up.
We have been working on communication, responsibility, and apologizing for years. Ever since I was pregnant with B 13 years ago.
There was a time this year that my husband and I couldn’t see eye to eye. His traumatic brain injury (and 7th concussion) from 2020 snuck up on us and affected his mental health earlier this year.
This year, we needed to lean on that whole communication, responsibility, and apologizing piece of our relationship or it may have fallen apart halfway through our 16th year.
Piece doesn’t describe it. Communication, responsibility, and apologizing are a huge part of the pie.
Without those 3, marriage isn’t nearly as fun or as hot or as warm as it should be, as it is meant to be.
And if we gave up when shit got hard earlier this year and stopped finding the adventure in every day we woke up, this would be a completely different post.
I am writing this as I wait for my husband to call and tell me his on his way home so I can go and feed the pups so we can go out to dinner.
We are shit poor, but while breaking down one of those doom piles, I found a $50 gift card to McMenamins this weekend.
Fate?
Well, it’s been a damn good year for us. We may have had a few rocky moments, but we fought hard and loved harder.
Not fate. Serendipity.
17 years ago, when I found my husband, I never could have imagined how big of an anchor he is in my life, keeping me grounded and on course.
BONUS: I forgot to mention that he has been with me through all of my weight gains, losses, and eliminations. And never once has he stopped cheering me on.
BONUS #2: I love that he stops wondering what my brain has come up with and just comes out and asks me, “what?”
In the meantime, Adventure on with Curioisty,
~ Kelly “Beast” Steele
P. S. BUY MY FIRST BOOK!!!!!! click HERE!!!
<//> It’s about a burnt-out and drowning mom who goes on a road trip in search of eternal happiness so she never experiences the deepest darkness again, but what she finds instead, changes her entire life. She found a secret she didn’t believe.
P.P.S Previous posts I have written specifically about our relationship. Looks like I need to write some more about our relationship:
- Fight hard, love harder (4.9.20)
- Falling in love again at a football game (9.8.21)
P.P.P.S When looking for a featured image a moment ago, I had the sudden realization that I don’t think we have taken many photos of us together in a long time. I need to remedy that. I wonder if I could get him to wear his ugly xmas sweater to dinner tonight and have the waiter/ress take our pic……
