Pt 5 (and final of this particular series) – Take Pride in being Unproductive – I will!
Day 473 – Monday, June 28th, 2021
Captain’s Log:
358am: Wake up – bladder must not have gotten the memo that I don’t have an alarm.
430am: Bzzz Bzzbzbzbbzbzbzzzzzzzz – Dangit! Forgot to cancel the alarms on my Fitbit….
7am: roll over to see husband has left for work already and I slept right thru it. Not sure how I feel about this…
808am: How is it already a gazillion degrees outside. Time for a freezing cold shower.
842am: Grab my cool new laptop/work bag and go next door to let my Auntie know I am ready to drive her to her appointment.
854am, realizing I don’t have a plan on where to hang out to pass the time: Dangit – the library isn’t open till 10am. I guess I could take my time and go find a Dutch Bros…..would they even let me bring it in?
855am: My Auntie takes her meds to prepare for the procedure.
856am: My Auntie answers the phone. Appointment had to be rescheduled due to the current dome o’ heat suffocating us.
906am: Decided to go to the pharmacy to pick-up our med refills…..why not? I don’t have a reason to wait until 130pm.
950am: Turn the fan on full blast pointing straight at my face, order lunch for drop off at noon, open my laptop – and catch up on emails and webinars I have been saving for months…….
1002am: Took an edible because I could
1041am: Last snoozed email – reminding me that E has an OT appt at 2pm…not like it has changed in over a year.
eh….ill be fine….
1130am: Huh – this feels weird. This cant be that easy can it?
1134am: Husband calls – his work closed early due to the dome o’ hell….
1154am: edible has kicked in fully, Wendy’s should be here any minute, and I am gonna take a nap BECAUSE I CAN!….
1206pm: Wendys arrived and I almost burst into flames within the 30 seconds it took to walk to my car…..immediately emailed OT and cancelled.
6hrs later – 620pm: I did nothing productive today. I did take a nap. OT was canceled due to the heat. And I surfed TT for a few hours too many.
But guess what…..Zero guilt. Zero panic that I have to wake up tomorrow morning and spend 8.5hrs in a state of constant stress.
I did catch myself reverting to believing I was a failure for being unproductive.
But then it me – I have mentally prepared for a day like today. Which is why I planned this week as a week of hibernations of sorts.
I planned for the first week of my unemployment to be full of things I want to do. Things that snap the cycle I had been in for my entire life.
I said yesterday that today is a New Monday. And on this New Monday – I am building the life I have always dreamed of.
Whatever I do get done – are sprinkles on the top. Because once this heat bubble bursts – look out world. I am ready for this.
Even though my internal clock is still on corporate time….
I am curious how long this is going to take….getting used to a new form of existence.
This may be the end of this series, but subscribe for updates on my life as a FT business-owner and parent who moonlights during the day as a homeschool teacher….
Side note: I read my daily tarot card before bedtime. I do not want it to dictate my actions. I prefer to see how my life unfolds – because nothing happens coincidentally.
