Pt. 1 – Final Countdown Eve
Day 469 – Thursday, June 24th, 2021
I am no stranger to diving head first into something without really knowing what I am supposed to be doing….
I wholeheartedly believe the more I say I know what I am doing…the more likely something will eventually click….
For example – our oldest is 11. I’m still figuring out this parenting thing. Really wishing I splurged for the baby manual…..
Oh…thats not a thing? Ugh fine. I’ll keep faking it….they are still alive and healthy and happy so I must be doing something right.
But that’s not the point of today’s post.
I have had a countdown sticky note next to my work computer for the past 67 days. 10 fridays ago- I didn’t know if today would ever make it.
But here I am…one more Friday. 1 more 8hr shift of back to back calls from disgruntled and entitled customers.
1 more morning of being awoken by my tornado warning alarm (dont judge….none of the other alarms worked…..) and instantly going in to panic mode.
Side note: I am morbidly curious how my body is going to react next week to the lack of being in a constant state of stress for 8.5hrs a day.
But I am also anxiously waiting for the anxiety and the panic and the stress to hit. Waiting to be blindsided with an existential crisis of “oh my god…what did I just do…..”
No one would blame me. I’m going from a steady paycheck to nothing until my business gets off the ground.
2 years ago….I was on the verge of being fired from the same job due to too many attendance points. Attendance points that I earned by having to rush to pick up our youngest due from school for a multitude of reasons. So many times in fact….that I now have PTSD from that daughter’s K-2nd grade years……
Living precariously on the edge – hoping the next day wasn’t the day I would get called to the managers office and let go.
I was petrified. What would we do? I convinced myself that we wouldn’t have survived without my job. So I doubled down and drained all of my energy for a job I was disposable at.
And then the pandemic hit and my friend died suddey….and the rest is history.
Change is hard for me. But this time…it feels right.
For once, in my nearly 34yrs of life….I can honestly say that I am not faking it. I am ready to make it.
In 24hrs – I will be a full time Freelance Copywriter and Storytelling Solopreneur.
It might hit me tomorrow just how huge of a step this is in my life.
It might not.
But what comes next…is worth everything I had to fake to make it to this moment, the eve of my world changing.
Curious to see how my world is about to change? Follow along for updates!
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