Day 416 of self quaranting as much as humanely possible
This kid right here brought some major tears to my eyes a few minutes ago.
I had to F5 my family a month ago and re-think our entire situation.
We began unschooling. We placed all our energies towards learning how to go with the flow. We started being curious about the world around us. I put in my 2 weeks notice 2 months early…
We were in a dark spot as a family. Something had to give…
But a few minutes ago as my heart was racing and the tears were flowing – it was then that I knew we were right supposed go be.
Because for once….in maybe forever….everything felt right.
In our household – electronics are a constant. In order to get tablet time – they must do something in exchange, to earn it…..usually….some days if no one is feeling like doing the thing….I am a big fan of the unlock till bedtime button.
Zero regrets. They are learning. Sometimes about diamonds and oak trees from minecraft….or about perseverance and not giving up from having to earn enough tokens in a game.
What happened earlier may not be a big deal for most of you…..
….but in our household where E was 90% nonverbal till 8.5yrs old, unable to contain her storms, let alone plan ahead…. its a huge freaking milestone!!!!!!!
This morning, after I unlocked her tablet for 30 mins, I told her that in order to unlock it again- I will need her help picking up the dirty clothes.
She thrives on prepping and transitions. During prep – I plant the seed, avoiding complication which leads to rejection.
9.9 times out of 10 – ADHD wins and both girls forget what the task was, only to remember as I repeat the seed. At which point I also go in to a little more detail of the requested task.
In our house – we put ALOT of praise and recognition and positivity on effort and persistence and doing things just bc….(or maybe I am a fan of Pavlov….)
After I F5’ed my family a month ago – we have begun setting new boundaries and creating new positive routines. Like going with the flow and picking our battles and hills we want to die on.
Why? Bc the stress and tension of NOT going with the flow – was suffocating. We were not living….we were drowning. Nobodies mental health was OK.
What happened this morning was bound to happen sooner or later. Last week – I noticed this shift in B.
But today – it really hit home that when I F5’ed my family a month ago – it was exactly what we needed.
So what did my daughter do?
She not only put the dirty clothes INTO the empty basket I had her place in that location 30 mins prior……she also moved the basket INTO the laundry room…..WITHOUT asking me what she needed to do next for more tablet time……….
I…..i….I’m frozen in amazement.
Our life has been a Rollercoaster that has reached the depths of hell and touched the skies of utopia.
E has made me question everything about reality. But I do know one thing to be true….our family is right where we need to be.
And this is your reminder to never give up on taking those leaps of faith….especially when your gut is telling you something needs to give.
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